17 Weeks

I just had my second pregnancy dream last night. I ended up having the baby, but having no memory of the birth or the new baby whatsoever. It ended up being a little boy, but when I saw him at five days old, he was the size of a toddler with blond hair and brown eyes. I end up having strong emotions with these dreams that will often carry through into my day. This morning I ended up feeling disappointed and cheated that I didn't get to experience the birth and all the memories that come with it and then having a toddler versus a newborn, that is just strange and left me feeling cheated.
Up until this point, I have secretly been thinking that this new baby is a girl. I say secretly(because everyone assumes that I need a girl and sometimes I do too) because I don't want to be disappointed when the u/s tech says, "It's a boy". Plus, I believe that God knows what he is doing if He decides not to give us a daughter. Also, it is because of the love I have for my two precious boys that I even wanted a third anyway, so that must mean that boys aren't half bad. (If you know me well, you know that I think they are the BEST). As long as this baby is healthy, what more could I ask for.
I mention this dream because around this point in my pregnancy with the boys I had dreams about their sex and each of those dreams were correct. Of course, I won't buy new baby boy outfits until after my u/s in February, but right now, that is what I am leaning towards.

Week Seventeen
By week 17, your baby weighs about 4.97 ounces (140gm) and is 5.12 inches (13cm) long.
He or she has a much more normal "human" appearance now. She holds her head more erect and her body and limbs are longer in proportion to her head.
Pads are forming on his tiny fingertips and toes. Soon those individual swirls and whorls will be apparent.
Her eyes are looking forward now, but they are still firmly closed.
Meconium (composed of products of cell loss, digestive secretion and swallowed amniotic fluid), is accumulating in the bowel. This black gooey substance will become your baby's first poop!
The umbilical cord is growing thicker and stronger and continues to rush blood and nutrients to your growing baby.
If your child is male the prostate begins to develop.
Her skeleton is tranforming from cartilage to bone. The bones remain flexible to make the journey through the birth canal easier.

16 Weeks

Yesterday I had my OB appointment. Dr. H went ahead and scheduled my ultrasound for February 13. (Just in time for Valentines). I will be 21 weeks at that point. He did say that I needed it done at 20-21 weeks and I am just a little irritated that I have to wait until 21 weeks instead of 20. I am just very anxious to find out what this little bean is. Right now, I have no feelings or any idea on what sex this baby is. This is not good, I want to shop. ;p

I also mentioned my cholesterol results to him and my concern over it rising and then the possible link to preterm labor. He seems to think that I am worrying over nothing and that everything will be fine. He has not seen a link between the two and feels that it is safe to just let it go and not worry. All of my other labs are fine.

Other than the above, my appointment was uneventful. I was thrilled to hear the heartbeat again. It is such an awesome sound.

16 week stats

Fat begins to form underneath skin, providing your baby with insulation for the coming months.
Did you know that both baby and placenta are now about the same size?
Your little one has reached 4.57 inches (11.6cm) and approximately 3.53 ounces (100gm).
His head and neck are held straighter now.
This is a week of "mights!" You might hear the tiny thumps of his heartbeat with an external monitor now. The genitals are developed sufficiently that an experienced sonographer might be able to determine if your baby is a boy or a girl.
Her heart is pumping as much as 6 gallons of blood a day and beats at a rate about double your heartrate.
If you could take a peek inside, you would witness your child's reflexes in action! (Sucking, swallowing and blinking are now evident.) She is probably even hiccuping even though you don't feel it yet!
Your baby has learned to breathe! This is apparent from the regular movements of his chest. Isn't it amazing that he is able to breathe "underwater," inhaling and exhaling small amounts of amniotic fluid? These actions help the lungs to develop and grow.

Reflections and Resolutions

Overall, 2007 was a really great year for me and my family. I am probably forgetting tons of things, but I have compiled a list of the Best and Worst of 2007.

Best

• Gavin turned four and had a really awesome birthday party at the gymnastics studio.
• He also spent most of this year wearing some type of costume. This kid loves to dress up, which makes Halloween very special for him.
• Owen became really verbal this year and is starting to break out of his shy shell(just a little)
• I reached my 21 month breastfeeding milestone with Owen. This is a really big accomplishment for me.
• We had such a great time indulging in summer treats such as strawberries and watermelon.
• Owen celebrated his second birthday with trucks and swimming.
• Gavin taught himself to swim and is a true merman. Everyone at the pool remarked on how little he is to swim so well(and he is very tall for his age). Even little Owen would jump off the side of the pool into our arms.
• Owen started his first year of school. I love both the boys teachers this year.
• Eddie and I celebrated our 7th anniversary.
• I finally got pregnant.
• I had a great first trimester with minimal sickness.
• My best friend had the sweetest baby girl ever. I was able to see her right after she was born.
• Eddie got a great teaching job which gives us extra money to pay bills and buy things we want and need.
• I started my job at the beginning of 2007 and I LOVE it!
• Christmas was the best this year.
• Gavin began eating shrimp.
• I have grown spiritually this year especially because of my miscarriage.

Worst

• Annette(my step-grandmother) died.
• I lost my baby.
• I have had a fallen out with one of my friends.
• Another fallen out with my in-laws occured and has not and may never be resolved.

I am looking forward to what I hope will be a fabulous year(though I am scared of the November election results).

Resolutions

I want to do a better job at performing random acts of kindness to perfect strangers. (You don't want to know what Eddie thought of this idea; if you know him you can probably guess. LOL)

Have this baby and establish a great breastfeeding relationship like I had with Owen.

Open our home up to different families in our church that I woud love to get to know better. (My goal is to host one person a month starting in February. We have to get through Gavin's birthday stuff first. )

Both of the boys are becoming strong-willed, so I need to learn how to deal with it and do a better job than I am doing right now.

I want to do a better job of raising the boys in a Christ centered home.

A Different Child

Owen talked up a storm yesterday at school. Prior to Christmas break, he said maybe two or three words to his teachers each class time and really did not interact with the other kids at all. Miss. Lisa said that the child had a complete turnaround yesterday and was laughing, talking louder than the other kids, and playing with them. She said that she spent most of the morning just watching him since she was so tickled about it. I am so proud of my shy little baby. ;p

Spirtitual Warfare

I know that God is in control. I believe with everything that is in me that I am his child. However, I am really struggling this morning. Over Christmas break, a local bank was robbed. This bank is right next to my kid's preschool. They have not caught the perpetrator and this leaves me very uneasy. Today was the first day back for the boys. After a night spent tossing, turning and crying out to God for peace and assurance, I cautiously took the boys to school. I did speak to their teachers and the director about safety and their emergency plans. So much of me, just wants to go get them and begin homeschooling them so I can be assured of their safety. However, Gavin and Owen both get so much out of being there with their peers and also having different personalities in trusting, caring adults to foster their learning and creativity. I know that I won't always be there or be able to protect them, that I can't shelter them forever. That is my desire though, to keep them safe and know they will never be hurt.
This is where my spiritual warfare begins. I know that God does not give me fear but peace; that this uneasy, out of control feeling is not from Him. Also, why is it so hard for me to give Him total control over my kids. Afterall, they were first and still His. I don't want to live my life fearing the worst.
Lord, I pray that you will deliver me from these fears and battle these demons. I can't do it on my own. Amen.

15 Weeks

Week Fifteen
You may begin to feel some fluttering movements as baby kicks, flails, twists and turns (but don't panic if you don't yet). She can also grasp, squint, frown, grimace and maybe suck her thumb!
Your baby's legs have grown longer than the arms and the body is now longer than the head.
And you'll be happy to note that he is moving those arms and legs often!
His skin is very thin -- so thin blood vessel are visible. It's covered by a fine, soft layer of hair called lanugo. Lanugo comes from a Latin word meaning "down." This hair is thought to help insulate your little boy.
The three tiny bones in his middle ear have begun to harden. The auditory centers in your baby's brain haven't developed yet, so she might not really understand what you say but her hearing capacity is in the process of developing.
Fingernails and toenails are growing.
Eyebrows are beginning to grow and even the hair his head is sprouting. It will probably change color and texture after birth.
All this and your little one is an amazing 3.98 inches (10.1cm) long and may weigh 2.47 ounces (70gm).

Bored

Today is the first day of 2008 and I spent it being bored. All day we have just lounged around, watched movies, ate, and played random games with the kids. Tomorrow Eddie goes back to work so I think I am going to get going after breakfast and head to town. I have no plans other than just getting out. Sometime this evening I plan on checking out Family Fun for some craft ideas for the kids. That may be on my To Do list for tomorrow. I also want to find some really neat invitations for Gavin's birthday party.